In his book translated as “Lie with Me”, (I read it in French) Philippe Besson takes part in an autobiography focusing on his high school crush, a man called Thomas Andrieu. With a very elegant prose, he describes how they came to be in a sexual relationship that had to come to an end as many do at the end of high school. Philippe was led to wonder if this was love, if Thomas, always mysteriously quiet, ever had feelings for him. In the second half of the book, by chance, the author runs into Lucas, a younger version of Thomas who happened to be his son. Despite having the possibility, Thomas and Philippe never reach out to one another. Through Lucas, it is found that Thomas had always stayed quiet and remained mysterious, to the point of assuming that he was tormented, suffering. We learn that he hung himself in 2016. The book ends with the heart breaking letter Thomas had written for Philippe after the last day they spent together, letter he never sent. It was found by Lucas. In it, Thomas said that “of course” it was love, that he had never been happier, that he never will be.

Philippe Besson has an incredible talent at describing setting, expectations and emotions with a lot of sensitivity and a lot of the use of the verb “advenir” (to happen), only to shatter the reader by relaying the action, the events and developments bluntly, with immediacy.

Another sad gay story that I recommend. Beautiful prose. A reminder that we all have a beautiful life ahead of us if we so dare to help ourselves.